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Category: Pregnancy & Work

Asked by HattieAdams

Q: Surrogacy

I tried for 9 years to conceive naturally. Nothing worked. I was living with a feeling that I'll conceive soon. But after 9 years, I finally came to reality. I came to know that nothing's gonna change anything here. So I did some research on this. I finally found the perfect clinic. It was giving several packages for the whole process. One best thing was It's safety procedures. Moreover, all the doctors were so kind and helpful. I was much relieved after seeing the complete documentation. I can't explain the feeling I had when I held my daughter for the first time in my hands. I'm truly grateful for her. But still, there is a void. I still think sometimes that it would be better if I conceived myself. I don't have any differences with my 2 weeks old baby. But I'm afraid that I'll have some when she'll be grown up girl. I'm worried about the feeling I have. So anyone of you experienced the same thing? How did you get over it? Some motivation would be great in this regard.

This question was asked Feb. 26, 2018 3:30am
Category: Pregnancy & Work

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Answers (31)

Answered by JanetJames - Mar. 27, 2018 5:11pm

Hey there. How are you doing? I hope you are doing great. I am really sorry you had to go through so much trouble. I know it must have been hard for you. I know because I have been through it. I have had surrogacy too. I feel like surrogacy is a blessing. Its a wonder of science. I was blessed with two twin boys. However, I have never felt that they were not mine. Or that I should have done it normally. I know there is mine cause I love them. I wish you good luck. Take care. Hoping to see more from you.

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Answered by monika123 - Mar. 27, 2018 4:02pm

Hey, Hattie, you're definitely overthinking. You giving birth would have been the same case. As your embryos instead of being inserted into your uterus were inserted in a surrogate. I think you should feel blessed and enjoy these moments. As you are lucky that you were actually able to have a baby. the technology has definitely improved and has provided us with such facilities. Your daughter is biologically linked with you and I think she deserves all your love. I hope the very best to you and I hope your feelings will soon fade away.

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Answered by sally28 - Mar. 27, 2018 2:44pm

Hey! Congratulations on having your daughter. Please don't think like that. This feeling is going to upset you later. I mean aren't you grateful that you have a child now? At least you are not childless like so many couples out there. You know what a bad feeling it is to be childless. So, please, treat her like a princess when she grows up. Don't let her feel bad. Good luck!

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Answered by TaylorF - Mar. 26, 2018 6:15pm

Hi. Please don't blame yourself for feeling like that. It is only natural and humane. Every person wants the best for themselves and surrogacy is like a second option. I also feel this way. I have a 2yo daughter through surrogacy. Sometimes, out of the blue, I feel a little insecure about myself. I think to myself why I couldn't conceive. Why I had to go to another woman to bear a baby for me. It'll fade with time. This feeling is only because of insecurity about yourself, not because of the baby.

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Answered by BarbaraGarman - Mar. 26, 2018 12:53am

Dear try to relax and believe that nothing is meaningless.Everything happens for our own good.It's our thinking that perhaps if I do it.this will be better.dear, think positive and it will happen greatly.Just keep your thoughts high and fight infertility.Surrogacy is the great process to have good success.I wish you have the healthy baby in future.Good luck.

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Answered by Akane966 - Mar. 23, 2018 4:01pm

Surrogacy is the best option so far.I have been through it.
I'm also infertile.But i had to go for surrogacy.We firstly moved to Europe form Japan.Surrogacy is ban in Japan so we moved there.We stayed in Europe for 4 months.We contacted clinics in Europe.My husband didn't liked them.Than we moved to Ukraine.
I joined this forum long ago.I like to read the stories of different people.Its been a very long time.I feel happy after reading successful stories of different people.
As we heard alot about the clinics in Ukraine so we moved there.There we found a very good clinic.The clinic found a good surrogate for us.The surrogate is pregnant with our twin dolls.We are so happy.We are so happy that we will have our own kids now,We are so thankful to the clinic and surrogate.
Everyone cheers and good luck.

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Answered by arabella12 - Mar. 23, 2018 10:36am

Hello Hattie, I must say you are very brave. You are so strong that you keep on thinking positive the whole 9 years. I must salute your strength. And don't think about that what will happen in future. God gives you a little angel. Just enjoy her. May be it is best for you not to have pregnancy by yourself rather you got the baby by other means. Everything that happens is best. Don't you worry at all.

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Answered by SelenaJones - Mar. 19, 2018 4:34pm

Well, I know how you feel. That's just your mother instinct! But, still, I am glad you did conceive one way or another! Last year my cousin sister also went for surrogacy to a Ukrainian clinic. I think you did great! You need to understand that she is your legal parent...You're doing it fine! You should really start accepting it what you're blessed with. You're really a lucky person. Wish you all the best in future with a baby girl...Sometimes, it's not in our fate to get something in our way. But another way. Stay blessed. xx

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Answered by pheobe412 - Mar. 19, 2018 3:26pm

Well, this is not your decision to be. It's all that is written and destined. It was going to be this way even if you do anything. So just be alright and be happy. The reason for being happy is that is you are a mother now. forget about your past and move on now. I wish you be happy always.

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Answered by jennyjoe - Mar. 18, 2018 6:04am

Hi there! That is definitely normal to feel, in my opinion. A part of you will always wish you were able to conceive naturally. However, once you spend more and more time with your baby you'll realize how lucky you are to even have her. Surrogacy saved my life. I was finally able to become a mother, which, due to some complications, I didn't think I could be. I don't think this feeling will become stronger. It should fade away soon. It did for me. Best wishes!

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