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Category: Newly Pregnant

Asked by Bailher

Q: Young and doubtful

Hi, I'm Bailey. I had my first ultrasound the other day. I'm 6 weeks along and I'm due September 9th. I'll be 17 when I have my baby and will still have a semester left of high school. Every time I see a commercial with babies and kids in it, it just really depresses me. Because I'm going to be having a kid so young. I feel so terrible bringing a baby into the world without having a dad. I'm afraid that I'm going to be alone for awhile because of this.. I have a lot of support from my friends, mom and family, but I'm still doubtful that I can really do this.. I'm still just a kid myself.. Some days I'm sort of excited to have a baby, and other days, I'm extremely depressed and want to terminate the pregnancy (which I can't afford). My job is only giving me 7-8 hours a week.. I definitely cant afford to have this baby if I cant afford an abortion.. I don't know what to do or what to think to try and feel better. I hate myself more and more everyday. This is exhausting... Any advice? :(

This question was asked Jan. 18, 2015 4:49am
Category: Newly Pregnant

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Answers (24)

Answered by Bumpin4Baby - Jan. 20, 2015 7:20pm

I hate to be so blunt, but you felt like you were adult enough to have sex and with having sex, pregnancy is a huge possibility. Just think of that little heartbeat inside of you. That heartbeat will love you more than anyone else could. I know you are only 16 and immature, but you can make a beautiful life for yourself and your baby. Why be worried about a boy not wanting you bc you will have a baby? If he doesn't want ALL of you then he isn't worth it in the first place. Besides, you have more important things to be worried about right now rather than a new boyfriend. I myself, think that there is nothing as beautiful as a mother that loves her children and a single mom showing the world that she CAN do it and don't need a man to do it for her is very empowering. Don't make a choice that you will regret. TONS of women can't have children and would love to adopt your precious baby if that is what you felt that you needed to do. That baby deserves a chance at LIFE.

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Answered by Papas~Mama - Jan. 19, 2015 6:41pm

You need to seek counseling. I disagree with other people, this is an OPINION forum and you're going to get some. Especially when you talk about wanting to have an abortion. EVERYONE on this website WANTS their babies and many have tried for years and years to do so. You talk about going through months of pain being pregnant(which doesn't even make sense, it's not constantly painful by any means)? How about the years of mental pain and anguish you're going to go through regretting killing another human being? I don't care what anyone else says, that's exactly what abortion is. There are many things you can do to improve your situation. Seek counseling, find another job, finish school. You put yourself into this adult situation and you need to take responsibility for that. Pray for guidance. Abortion can f*ck up your body and your mind. You would regret it.

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Answered by tjwjtw21 - Jan. 18, 2015 7:09pm

I don't disagree with abortion, but I also don't think it should be used as a form of birth control. I think there is a time and a place for it (like rape). Adoption is a BEAUTIFUL thing and whats great about it these days is you can make it what YOU want. If you want to know your child, you can. Maybe consider someone in your family to care for your child until you get together enough to do it for yourself. There are so MANY options in the world of adoption. Yeah- maybe you will have stretch marks or something, but your body isn't "ruined" by having a baby. It recovers and heals, and like previous posters- you can help it along. It is what you make of it!! I TRULY wish the best for you and your baby and hope that whatever you choose, it a choice you had professional help making and one that you can live with FOREVER. Best wishes hun!!

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Answered by tjwjtw21 - Jan. 18, 2015 7:04pm

I have to agree with most everyone else- I think you need some professional help before making any decisions. There are ways to accomplish your goals and still be a mom. I've been there. I was a high school drop out (not sue to pregnancy), pregnant at 19 from a one night stand and even had a criminal record at one point. I was able to go to college and obtain a nursing degree. I am a single parent who has support from my mom and no one else. Yes, times were tough and hard, but all worth it in the end. I have 2 beautiful boys that are 14 and 5, and now I'm expecting twins. Now, with twins coming- I sometimes find myself thinking like I did when I was 19 and pregnant- "how will I do this???", but I remember I am only dealt what HE feels I can handle. Is it always easy?? NOT AT ALL. But we make it and life is good for my kids and I. I own my car, a brand new home and have an education- all things I've done while being a single parent. Continued in next postâ?&b

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Answered by estone - Jan. 18, 2015 5:49pm

if you are concerned about your body image while being pregnant, there are ways you can be healthy and not have it "ruin" your body. Eat right, exercise, and take care of yourself are ways to help manage the extra weight you will carry during the pregnancy

I can tell you that after having 2 miscarriages, which includes losing twins at 18 weeks and then getting pregnant 6 months later with my son and when he was 6 months old I got pregnant with my daughter (they are 15 months apart). I was pregnant 4 times in the course of 3 years. My daughter just turned 1 and I now feel the best I have ever felt and my body is in great shape too. If you work at it, you will accomplish it.

I highly suggest speaking with a professional about your feelings. You have time to process all the changes and will be able to make a more informed decision once the baby gets here. If you truly feel that you want to abort, that is up to you and it is only a decision you can make. Hope you get some

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

422 out of 844 found this answer helpful

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

423 out of 838 found this answer helpful

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

432 out of 877 found this answer helpful

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

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