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Category: Miscarriage & Loss

Asked by ktink5000

Q: Is anyone else's spouse mean and insensitive to them after pregnancy loss?

Ive gone through 2 pregnancy loss withing the last 9 months and he gets mad because we not having sex. currently I just got a methotexate shot and waiting on my levels to drop and he just makes me feel soo bad. is anyone else going through this?

This question was asked Jul. 5, 2015 10:50pm
Category: Miscarriage & Loss

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Answered by HzlGreenEyes - Jul. 6, 2015 5:54pm
During this time he is trying to find a way to connect to you on an emotional level and one of the ways to do that is through a physical connection. I completely understand your frustration but men are wired differently. They seek comfort that way. Remember he is going through this with you and it is hard for him to show his emotions... like they are being strong for you even though they are upset with the loss. I have given my husband pleasure other ways. We have to be sensitive to their needs as well because if we don't connect with our spouses now and while having children, when our children leave we are left with each other. It is up to you as a couple to understand one another. Even sitting down with him explaining what you are feeling and ask if there is something special he wants. Compromise and communication is key during this time. Good Luck! And I am sooo sorry for your loss. I pray you find peace and strength during this time. My heart goes out to you and you husband. XX

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Answered by Mrs.Mom - Jul. 6, 2015 3:50pm
So sorry to hear this. It's tough enough emotionally after a loss, but to feel unsupported and pressured to have sex adds to that. Have you had a serious talk with him about where your emotions are at as well as where your body is at physically? Is your husband normally more sensitive or is this normal behaviour for him? Either way, the only thing you can do is explain to him where you're at and maybe give him a timeline as to when he can expect you to be back to normal so he can quit bugging you about it. Maybe find an article that explains pregnancy loss and the aftermath. Best wishes

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Answered by gemmalou79 - Jul. 6, 2015 11:44am
I am so sorry you are going through this, I too suffered from an ectopic but thankful my husband was supportive as he could be. I don't think men know exactly what we go through but I know I was told not to have sex for a few weeks after the Methotrexate shot. big hugs x

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