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Category: Miscarriage & Loss

Asked by blondeone12

Q: Sister in Law suffered a miscarriage.

Right now i am 22 weeks pregnant with my first. I just got a call last night from my sister in law telling me she suffered a miscarriage. I did not know before this that they were pregnant or even trying. My question is, how can i be sensitive during this difficult time for her, but still be excited about my pregnancy when she is around? Should i just not bring it up when she is around, or just assume that her reactions to things might be a bit dampened by her loss?
Any advice from others that have been in my situation or my sister in law's situation would be appreciated.

Thanks

This question was asked Jan. 5, 2016 12:27pm
Category: Miscarriage & Loss

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Answered by rihana012 - Mar. 23, 2018 4:53pm
Hey, Her miscarriage is not your fault. You have to happy and enjoy this joyful moment. Still, I am feeling sorry for your sister in law. I can feel the pain of miscarrying a baby. I had 3 miscarriages in 6 months. After that, my gynaecologist told me that I cannot be a mother again. I was so depressed. I always wanted to feel a baby inside me. But this is not written in fate. Now I have a daughter through surrogacy. I am happy that I took a right decision on time. I would suggest this procedure to all the couple who want babies and cannot conceive naturally. This is a good procedure to carry out. If your sister in law is suffering from the same situation then she can opt surrogacy. My family is completed now. I am planning to have another baby.

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Answered by blondeone12 - Jan. 7, 2016 1:31pm
Thank you everyone. I went ahead and reached out to her and let her know i was thinking about her, but am keeping news from my pregnancy quite until she asks and is ready. We ended up talking for about an hour about the miscarriage, and then just about life in general (like stuff we would have talked about regularly). I told her that i am here to talk to, or that she can tell me that she needs some time. Other than that i will be following her lead. Thank you for the responses.

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Answered by natmomof1 - Jan. 6, 2016 11:25pm
I agree with lala. It is best to be there for her and not to mention pregnancy at all unless she asks. Give her some time and space to mourn and let her determine when she is comfortable talking about your pregnancy. Mommy butterfly, I am very sorry to hear about your loss.

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Answered by lala_0412 - Jan. 5, 2016 2:58pm
I worked with a lady who was expecting twins when I was pregnant with my youngest son. She miscarried as well. I just apologized for her loss. I stayed away from the topic of pregnancy with her unless she asked me something about mine.

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Answered by Mommybutterfly - Jan. 5, 2016 2:26pm
When I had my chemical pregnancies it didn't hit me me the way my missed miscarriage did. I was completely devastated didn't want to have a thing to do with anyone pregnant or not pregnant and was drinking every time until I'd pass out and get up the next day to do it again. The only thing you can do is try to be there for her as much as she will let you.

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