Questions & Answers

No, I wouldn't say that you are over-reacting. They must realize that you are pregnant and it really is one big a deal. It might not sound really great, but every woman has its needs and she can get hurt, too. You need to have a long talk with your husband and if he won't stand up to his mom then you sit down with her and explain how you are feeling. I have learned that it's ok to offend people during this time, you have to do what is best for you and baby. A mother has no matter, stand up for her baby if no one stands up for her. This is the pure love of a mother. You can not think about the goodwill of your baby. I wish I could help you from afar. Take care, and, stay safe.

Hello, I can relate so much with you. First my mother-in-law, put a lot of stress over me for wanting a baby boy. She made me live my pregnancy days like hell. Taunting me over anything and everything. I used to have so many morning sicknesses, but she would acknowledge none and would instead make me work all the time. As soon as we came to know that its a baby girl, my life was particularly a living hell. I knew it would be the same for my daughter. So I somehow managed to get in touch with my own mother. She was so shattered, she couldn't believe a mother saying those words. But during all this time, I only wanted my husband to stand up for me. He never did. He made me feel like as if being pregnant was a task of my own and he had not a single responsibility in the same. I wanted to run away. I wanted to give my baby a good and better life. I know how it goes with some of the in-laws. They treat you worse than enemies. When a woman needs most of the support, they abandon you then.

I had a similar situation. My mother is 300 miles away, and my mother-in-law is literally the next town over. She wanted to be in the room with me for my delivery, and to hold my hand, and do other mother-daughter things. Trouble is, I didn't want her there. I wanted my husband, and that's it. Even my own mother wasn't told about my labor until after my son was born. My husband and I decided to just keep the whole thing quiet until after the baby was born. My MIL was (and still is) ticked that I "shut her out", but you do what you gotta do! Labor and delivery is not the time to play to anybody's feelings but your own. After the baby was born, I STILL didn't let the woman in my house. I just told her I was bonding with my family and was terrified of brining in infectious diseases (yeah, her). It sucks to sneak around and do damage control after the fact; but my husband's a push-over for his Mama and didn't want to hurt her feelings. Do what you need to do for you and y

So, when she says "take care of you" does she mean help you, or is she threatening you? It doesn't sound like you are being unreasonable, it sounds like your husband needs to man up and tell his mother to back off. I am pregnant with my 2nd baby and what I learned from my first is that it is so important to set firm boundaries. You may feel differently then I did and want people in your house "helping you" after baby comes, but I didn't, I wanted time with my new family and I needed time to recover without having to be sociable to my in laws. It's amazing how bringing your child home will empower you to stand up and say what you and he/she needs, because baby is your first priority now. I would have a long talk with your husband and if he won't stand up to his mom then you sit down with her and explain how you are feeling. I have learned that its ok to offend people during this time, you have to do what is best for you and baby.