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explain me the unexplained

Category: General - Pregnancy Buddies/Groups
Posted by MarlenS » Mar. 27, 2017 7:32am

We tried to build our family since we had married. You have to know we are younger than 30, my husband has good sperm the same as I have good egg quality. For more than two years at the beginning we have been trying to conceive without treatment. After cycle of Clomid and IUI we didn’t achieve pregnancy. It wasn’t the end of our journey. Also we passed through two IVF rounds and our pregnancy didn’t begin.
What I can think and do? We still have a huge desire to become parents to experience this feeling. The doctors don’t explain any reasons but only statistic, that 10-20 % couples have the same problem.
We have enough money, wish, and health to continue and we ask for your advices.

Posts: 31

Replies (9)

Reply by Laimamom » Mar. 27, 2017 8:49am

Hello my dear! I’m so sorry to hear your story and I understand you perfectly. I know without prompts how it’s hard to give all power-time-money for getting any result and get nothing, even the defined cause of the failure is absent. Don’t lose a hope. You know that 30 years ago the 50 % of couples which unsuccessfully tried to conceive received the same diagnosis as you. you may undergo through 10 IVF without positive outcomes and you may eventually get pregnant someday in natural way. But what do you do now?

Posts: 34

Reply by val789 » Mar. 27, 2017 9:38am

Really serious problem! I'm not a doctor and cannot help you to explane why is that, but I want to tell you a story that probably gives you some food for thought. I know a couple that has the same problem, they much older than you, well, they've been trying to concieve 10 years and nothing. One day they decided to give up. After two years of such childless existence, they changed their mind and made a decision to use surrogacy. Now they have their own healthy child, carried by surrogate mother. They are very happy right now. they only regret about the time they wasted on blaming the fate and doing nothing.
I don't suggest you to go for surrogacy, you can keep trying!
My point here is that, there are no hopeless situations. You should always fight for your happiness!

Posts: 15

Reply by MarlenS » Mar. 27, 2017 10:45am


No doubts you are totally right, and we keep on fighting/ it’s a reason why I’m here. Such replies as your one give me a might to go on. We even haven’t tried DE IFV, and we always get advices to try.
Suppose unlike your mates, we still have enough portion of time to use different methods. I don’t exclude that surro will appear again on our future path in case other treatment was unsuccessful.

Posts: 31

Reply by MarlenS » Mar. 27, 2017 10:58am


Thank you very much! We’re still trying hard! Hah. And we hope one day (perhaps one beautiful morning) we’ll find out I’m pregnant and everything will go right way. I read about that. And what a hope did people have several years ago if doctors couldn’t explain anything? really nobody can explain me anything now. We are not completely alright because I had been stimulated 3 weeks ago, and I’m recovering.

Posts: 31

Reply by val789 » Mar. 27, 2017 11:05am

As I understood right, your eggs and husband's sperm are good, in that case, why do you need the ED IVF then? don't you want to have your 100% biological child? I know that not every woman can go for surrogacy and let the other person carry her baby, but in my opinion it's better than ED. Well, one choose upon its own considerations.

Posts: 15

Reply by MarlenS » Mar. 27, 2017 11:50am


I got it. I don’t know how to answer you the rightest way. We didn’t consider the surrogacy so detailed, the first reason is because of complete prohibition to perform the surrogacy in Norway. As well as the DE procedures are banned. This forces us to look for options abroad. And we really have no instructions where the good destinations are.
When you described the benefits of surrogacy in two words this sounded attractive. But in fact it has a lot of pitfalls and difficulties, have you experienced a surrogacy?

Posts: 31

Reply by Gallawale » Mar. 27, 2017 12:03pm

You don’t have any reasons to be upset. I know you’ll be happy in soon and receive good news. When it happens please confirm my words! Fingers crossed for your future. I can understand you feel empty because you are like a hamster on the spinning wheel. Spending all resources to get nothing at last.
What variants did you consider with your husband? Maybe try on the donor eggs is a salvation?

Posts: 16

Reply by MarlenS » Mar. 27, 2017 12:50pm


Hang on, there’s the one crucial aspect. De reproductology deprives my chance to transmit my biological information to my future babe, and it urges me to take part in surrogacy program, but in this case my ability to experience the pregnancy is also deprived. And it tears me apart. The same time I’d be able to try IVF again but I’m afraid to lose a time and another piece of my health. Anyway I understand I need to search for the variants abroad.

Posts: 31

Reply by val789 » Mar. 27, 2017 1:25pm

Yes, I understand that infertility feeling you have. But mine infertility was explaned.
I'm actually in the end of this surrogacy jorney. Our surrogate mother is on her 38 week. I'm in Ukraine right now, looking forward to see my newborn baby. I´m from Ireland. The surrogacy is legal here, but according to our law the mother of child is the one who give birth, and an adoption process for biological parents is quite complex. That´s why we had to find options abroad. Analyzing the huge amount of information we´ve decided to go to Ukraine. The surrogacy law here is easy. according to the contract surrmother doesn´t have any right for a child she carried.

Posts: 15