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SheisMrsCarter's Pregnancy
My Due Date: I suffered a pregnancy lossAge: 38 years old
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My Cerclage Story
By SheisMrsCarter » Posted Nov. 18, 2016 4:00pm - 708 views - 4 comments
So, I go in on 12/2 to get my cerclage done, which I will be 10w4d!! YES, you read it right 10W4D! My doctor has recommended that since all of MC results from testing have come back perfectly fine, as far as the baby's health and genes, then it just means my cervix is extremely weakened. During those times of losing all of my angels, the hardest thing was to watch them pass away and then give them over to someone and never see them or have them growing inside me anymore....just thinking about it now makes me cry. But now I feel like that sacrifice was completely worth it because I have a doctor who believes, just as hard as I do, that THIS.WILL.WORK! With proper monitoring, extra light duty work (which I do anyway) and some prayer, my baby will be born healthy.
Now, to the not-so-happy part. 12/2/15 was the day I lost my last princess. It was definitely the worst of them all because of how attached we were to her. We listened to her heartbeat on the doppler almost every night once we found out how to use it. We were actually one day away from getting a preventive cerclage the night we lost her. My body just didn't hold on long enough. One year exactly it will be on 12/2 and while I'm so happy about protecting this one, I still remember her. That's how I know God is working this out for us b/c he's set everything in place for a time such as this, and I'm going to have faith in it every step of the way.
I am freaking out though about how much or little pain I am going to experience with this.... Is the light spotting they talk about going to really be light or am I going to think it's too much and something's wrong then run back and forth the hospital for nothing?...Is cramping going to be normal or what the heck is the definition of "normal" cramping with a cerclage?....there's also a chance of getting scar tissue with the cerclage and is that going to affect my birth plan of having a vaginal birth or mess up any future chances of getting pregnant?...Welcome to my mind. As confident as I am in this being effective, these little tidbits could ruin a happy moment for me...and it shouldn't because the outcome will be that I get to hold my fresh out the womb, smelling like Johnson&Johnson (because that's only lotion I'm putting on) baby at the end of it all, but sometime I wonder...
Nevertheless, I'm so excited to meet little Ms/Mr Carter and no matter what the "risks" are, I'd go to hell and back(which it seems like I am) if it means having them here with me. I go for my first u/s on Monday and I can't wait to see them for the first time. We elected to hold off from the transvag u/s because of the "sticking something up there" risk and with all these symptoms I'm having, I'm pretty sure the baby's fine. That's one risk we're not wiling to take. I don't know if it was the sex that caused other ones or the constant sex PLUS the U/S I was having every other week, so we wanted to play it safe and let our times seeing the baby be special. Patience in this case is truly a virtue, seeing as how bad I want to see my baby's every progression but it's going to be so worth it when I burst out in tears for seeing him/her for the first time and they don't look like a rice grain with a heartbeat lol. It's going to have little arm buds and leg buds and appear more like a baby (or shrimp) and that's going to do so much for me and my hubby that words can't describe.
Yea, I'm really scared the procedure but I know this is a must, and since it's preventative and not a rescue one, I will have a little bit more freedom and not have to stay horizontal for 27 weeks so that's good too. I'm sure me and hubby are going to pay for it (literally) because it's not the cheapest procedure in the world, but with this insurance it's going to help and we don't care b/c it's contributing to the greater cause. On to 11/21, then to 12/2. God Bless Us ALL
My Journal
My Cerclage Story
By SheisMrsCarter » Posted Nov. 18, 2016 4:00pm - 708 views - 4 comments
So, I go in on 12/2 to get my cerclage done, which I will be 10w4d!! YES, you read it right 10W4D! My doctor has recommended that since all of MC results from testing have come back perfectly fine, as far as the baby's health and genes, then it just means my cervix is extremely weakened. During those times of losing all of my angels, the hardest thing was to watch them pass away and then give them over to someone and never see them or have them growing inside me anymore....just thinking about it now makes me cry. But now I feel like that sacrifice was completely worth it because I have a doctor who believes, just as hard as I do, that THIS.WILL.WORK! With proper monitoring, extra light duty work (which I do anyway) and some prayer, my baby will be born healthy.
Now, to the not-so-happy part. 12/2/15 was the day I lost my last princess. It was definitely the worst of them all because of how attached we were to her. We listened to her heartbeat on the doppler almost every night once we found out how to use it. We were actually one day away from getting a preventive cerclage the night we lost her. My body just didn't hold on long enough. One year exactly it will be on 12/2 and while I'm so happy about protecting this one, I still remember her. That's how I know God is working this out for us b/c he's set everything in place for a time such as this, and I'm going to have faith in it every step of the way.
I am freaking out though about how much or little pain I am going to experience with this.... Is the light spotting they talk about going to really be light or am I going to think it's too much and something's wrong then run back and forth the hospital for nothing?...Is cramping going to be normal or what the heck is the definition of "normal" cramping with a cerclage?....there's also a chance of getting scar tissue with the cerclage and is that going to affect my birth plan of having a vaginal birth or mess up any future chances of getting pregnant?...Welcome to my mind. As confident as I am in this being effective, these little tidbits could ruin a happy moment for me...and it shouldn't because the outcome will be that I get to hold my fresh out the womb, smelling like Johnson&Johnson (because that's only lotion I'm putting on) baby at the end of it all, but sometime I wonder...
Nevertheless, I'm so excited to meet little Ms/Mr Carter and no matter what the "risks" are, I'd go to hell and back(which it seems like I am) if it means having them here with me. I go for my first u/s on Monday and I can't wait to see them for the first time. We elected to hold off from the transvag u/s because of the "sticking something up there" risk and with all these symptoms I'm having, I'm pretty sure the baby's fine. That's one risk we're not wiling to take. I don't know if it was the sex that caused other ones or the constant sex PLUS the U/S I was having every other week, so we wanted to play it safe and let our times seeing the baby be special. Patience in this case is truly a virtue, seeing as how bad I want to see my baby's every progression but it's going to be so worth it when I burst out in tears for seeing him/her for the first time and they don't look like a rice grain with a heartbeat lol. It's going to have little arm buds and leg buds and appear more like a baby (or shrimp) and that's going to do so much for me and my hubby that words can't describe.
Yea, I'm really scared the procedure but I know this is a must, and since it's preventative and not a rescue one, I will have a little bit more freedom and not have to stay horizontal for 27 weeks so that's good too. I'm sure me and hubby are going to pay for it (literally) because it's not the cheapest procedure in the world, but with this insurance it's going to help and we don't care b/c it's contributing to the greater cause. On to 11/21, then to 12/2. God Bless Us ALL
Comments for this Journal Entry
 | Comment from SheisMrsCarter » Posted Nov. 21, 2016 1:18pm Thanks ladies. I truly appreciate the kind and encouraging words. By no means am I planning to go full throttle b/c it's a preventative, I just know that I don't have to be on bedrest for the rest of my pregnancy and that's good enough because that was my biggest fear when I first realized I had to get one. Of course, I will be taking it lightly as I said anyway because I'm going to always be cautious of how it's holding up. Don't worry, I will be doing everything I can to make this a successful pregnancy |
 | Comment from uyezowami » Posted Nov. 21, 2016 2:00am Wishing you all the best dear and I believe all will go well. I like that you believe this baby will make it, that is exactly my mindset, I had fears and worries when i got pregnant after a loss but I knew this baby will make it and today we are going strong at 32 weeks. Keep the faith and Hope. |
 | Comment from tcinks » Posted Nov. 20, 2016 7:23am Yay! Glad you have a great, proactive Doctor this time!!! :) I have a lot of the same thoughts and questions you have, but I HAVE to believe this will work. Mine is tomorrow!!!! I'll let you know every detail, good and bad! ;) |
 | Comment from Mrsfingerscrossd » Posted Nov. 19, 2016 3:23pm Best wishes for the procedure, you are one strong lady. Although it's preventative please try to do as little as possible especially in the second trimester. I would get as much bed rest as possible. |
