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kCharleneS's Pregnancy
My Due Date: July 12, 2013I have given birth!
Age: 32 years old
Location: Colfax, United States
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Buzz Kill
By kCharleneS » Posted Feb. 12, 2013 10:52pm - 201 views - 2 comments
Well, my day WAS going well, but now all I want to do is cry. For the past few weeks my son has been trying to call me Kelly instead of Mommy. I didn't think anything of it, just kept reminding him that I'm Mommy. Only people that are not my children get to call me Kelly.
Well last week, my ex (RJ) wanted to cut his visitation short so he could make a trip out of town. I live 15 miles out of his town, and to get to the town he was headed to, you go have to go through my town and drive literally right passed my apartment. He wanted me to drive 15 miles to his town to get our son when he was going to be going through it the next day anyways. But because it states in our parenting plan that I am responsible for pick up and if I can't drive to get him, I have to pay him gas money. But I don't feel I should have to since he was driving right passed my house anyways so it'd be a waste of gas for us to pick him up and I refuse to fund his trip.
Anyways, so we picked him up Friday night, (he gets Nathan Thursday and Friday nights and every other Saturday.) I knocked on the door and I heard Nate say, "Is that Kelly?" But when his wife answered the door, not a single word to tell him that I'm his mom or anything. Then when we were walking to the car, Nathan started crying saying, "I'm gonna miss my doggies and Mommy." So he's been calling her Mommy and me Kelly. He used to call her Mommy Crista and when I confronted them about it almost a year ago I got a giant fuck you. So I let the issue go. Now I can't. I asked him tonight why he calls Crista Mommy and he said, "Because Mommy says she's my mommy."
And then tonight he told me that my belly's not big, I'm just fat. That hurt really bad. When I tried explaining to him that I'm not fat, it's just the baby getting bigger and that pushes my tummy out he matter of factly said, "Nope, you're just fat." I have no idea where he learned that from because we try not to talk about people's weight around him. I want him to associate people with their personalities, not their weight. And even though Crista is at least 200 pounds, I never call her fat or anything around him. And I know for a fact he's not learning it at school because that's something his teachers would have talked to me about. The only other people he's around are RJ and Crista. But I can't get an answer out of Nate who told him that I'm fat and not getting bigger because of the baby, he kept saying my boyfriend, Teacher Sydne, Teacher Deanna. All people I know who would never do that.
So tomorrow I will be calling around and getting a lawyer. My mom told me she thinks it's time I do so and she was our mediator. She says that legally a step parent cannot force a child to call them mom. And I'm tired of them trash talking me around and to my son. To me, that's emotional abuse. That's fucking with his head. And this is the same woman who I had to call CPS on in September because of abuse being done to my son when he was in their care. So I'm done.
They want to play these silly little games and pretend I don't exist and play house, then they will only see him once a week and every other weekend. I will not let them fuck with my child's head any further.
My Journal
Buzz Kill
By kCharleneS » Posted Feb. 12, 2013 10:52pm - 201 views - 2 comments
Well, my day WAS going well, but now all I want to do is cry. For the past few weeks my son has been trying to call me Kelly instead of Mommy. I didn't think anything of it, just kept reminding him that I'm Mommy. Only people that are not my children get to call me Kelly.
Well last week, my ex (RJ) wanted to cut his visitation short so he could make a trip out of town. I live 15 miles out of his town, and to get to the town he was headed to, you go have to go through my town and drive literally right passed my apartment. He wanted me to drive 15 miles to his town to get our son when he was going to be going through it the next day anyways. But because it states in our parenting plan that I am responsible for pick up and if I can't drive to get him, I have to pay him gas money. But I don't feel I should have to since he was driving right passed my house anyways so it'd be a waste of gas for us to pick him up and I refuse to fund his trip.
Anyways, so we picked him up Friday night, (he gets Nathan Thursday and Friday nights and every other Saturday.) I knocked on the door and I heard Nate say, "Is that Kelly?" But when his wife answered the door, not a single word to tell him that I'm his mom or anything. Then when we were walking to the car, Nathan started crying saying, "I'm gonna miss my doggies and Mommy." So he's been calling her Mommy and me Kelly. He used to call her Mommy Crista and when I confronted them about it almost a year ago I got a giant fuck you. So I let the issue go. Now I can't. I asked him tonight why he calls Crista Mommy and he said, "Because Mommy says she's my mommy."
And then tonight he told me that my belly's not big, I'm just fat. That hurt really bad. When I tried explaining to him that I'm not fat, it's just the baby getting bigger and that pushes my tummy out he matter of factly said, "Nope, you're just fat." I have no idea where he learned that from because we try not to talk about people's weight around him. I want him to associate people with their personalities, not their weight. And even though Crista is at least 200 pounds, I never call her fat or anything around him. And I know for a fact he's not learning it at school because that's something his teachers would have talked to me about. The only other people he's around are RJ and Crista. But I can't get an answer out of Nate who told him that I'm fat and not getting bigger because of the baby, he kept saying my boyfriend, Teacher Sydne, Teacher Deanna. All people I know who would never do that.
So tomorrow I will be calling around and getting a lawyer. My mom told me she thinks it's time I do so and she was our mediator. She says that legally a step parent cannot force a child to call them mom. And I'm tired of them trash talking me around and to my son. To me, that's emotional abuse. That's fucking with his head. And this is the same woman who I had to call CPS on in September because of abuse being done to my son when he was in their care. So I'm done.
They want to play these silly little games and pretend I don't exist and play house, then they will only see him once a week and every other weekend. I will not let them fuck with my child's head any further.
Comments for this Journal Entry
 | Comment from kCharleneS » Posted Feb. 13, 2013 2:52pm Thank you. I did tell him that it hurts my feelings when he says things like that. I also told him it hurts other people's feelings to be called that so that's why we don't. He'll be 4 next month. And my ex's wife does have a kid, she had her first in November. But it's super frustrating that she's demanding this. My mom told me to get legal advice as well. And on top of that, my son has also started showing very violent behavior that he's never shown before. Just today I had to pick him up 2 hours into the day because he stabbed a little boy with a fork, a little girl with a pencil, threw bark at a kid and said "Sock me", pushed a girl, threw blocks. All of this new behavior. I've got an appointment set for Tuesday for him to see a therapist because his teacher thinks something is bothering him but he won't tell us. |
 | Comment from GemGem » Posted Feb. 13, 2013 11:34am First of all id like to say im sorry that you are having to go through this. people like your ex and his wife are an embarrassment to society. Get legal advice and take it further. My son has said hurtful things to me (unknowingly) and i have told him that he shouldn't say things that hurt peoples feelings. I ask him if he wants to make me sad and of course he says no. So i let him know that things like that do make people sad and ask how he would feel if someone said mean things to him. Its done the trick, my son is so polite and such a kind boy. Im not sure how old your son is but mine is 6 so he is at an age where I can explain and he can understand. Its such a shame you have had to put up with these (to put it politely) a'holes. I hope it all works out for you soon. It makes me so angry. if she wants to be someones "Mum" then she should have her own kid! |
