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Category: Relationships During Pregnancy

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Q: Should I stay, or should I go?

Last night my fiance and I got into a really horrible fight, that ended up getting physical on both our parts. The fight started because I wouldn't tell him in great detail about my day. (I am on bed rest, so my explanation consisted mostly of, I layed on the couch, I layed in bed, and I watched cartoons.) He got very angry and started accusing me of cheating on him, and all sorts of other horrible things. When I started getting very worked up, I told him to leave. That I couldn't take the stress. He then pounced on me, and not only hit me multiple times, face, abdomen, back, sides, but resorted to choking me when I fought back. He choked me into unconsciousness. When I came to, he was sitting on my belly, holding me down and screaming at me. This was the worse he has ever been in a fight, he has thrown me around before, but never made me fear for my life like this. I don't want my kids to have no dad, so I don't know, should I stay or should I go?

This question was asked Jan. 25, 2013 8:48pm
Category: Relationships During Pregnancy

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Answers (21)

Answered by Bostonmama08 - Jan. 26, 2013 12:00am

Holy shit. Get OUT of that house. Please! Call your family....please get some place safe. Think about your baby...and the safety of the two of you. I would even call the police and press charges....get a restraining order. I am so sad for you....so sad. No one EVER should be treated like this! Especially a pregnant woman.

Please get somewhere safe.

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Answered by Kimmiecat - Jan. 25, 2013 9:18pm

Go. Without question, go.

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Answered by GemGem - Jan. 25, 2013 9:00pm

You dont want your children to be without Dad but you would prefer this violent man being around them? he is a risk to others so he could potentially cause harm to your children, as he doesnt seem to think twice about hitting a woman. What he is doing is TOTALLY unacceptable. To me he sounds like a bully who hits women. I was in this situation with my first pregnancy and it went on until my son was born, only then i had the strength to leave him. You should go to the police. Thats one of the mistakes I made then as now 6 years on my Ex is taking me to court for unsupervised contact, and i have no evidence of his battery. Please talk to someone a family member, friend, police anyone. This should NOT be happening!

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Answered by monroezelda - Jan. 26, 2013 2:00pm

and on the other hand my best friend suffered violence in her relationship for many years, even being booted in the head going the hospital etc, her partner never changed, she has since left him and has a much happier life with her children.
I am totally shocked at your partnes level of violence, and can only suggest to get out while u can, this sounds lvery dangerous to you and your baby. I really am stunned. good luck I hope u find a way out xx

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Answered by GemGem - Jan. 25, 2013 9:06pm

harsh*

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Answered by a member - Jan. 25, 2013 11:33pm

No dad is better than an evil dad! The only thing u should worry about now is u and the baby!! Leave now! Anything physical should not be tolerated! Press charges as well and stay away from this evil person!!!!

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Answered by brittneyp400 - Jan. 26, 2013 8:01pm

Go, if he did this once, he will do it again and you never know but he could very well do this to the baby. Press charges, you deserve better.

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Answered by looney - Jan. 28, 2013 6:15am

Get a restraining order first. That way when he goes to court to get custody he will most likely fail miserably. then you can move on with your life, and find a GOOD MAN, (yes, dont settle for another dirt bag please!) and then your baby will have a nice new daddy and crap-daddy wont be in the picture. been there done that!

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Answered by a member - Jan. 29, 2013 5:12pm

I packed my things and left last night. I coulldn't take the fear anymore. I really have no family to turn to, and all our friends are mutual... So I left on my own, with all of your comments pushing me. I am in a deeply depressed state right now, my mind keeps telling me to go back home, but my body, and the bruises scream that it will happen again, the minute I walk through the door. The babies are doing fine, no injurys, and I am going to be doing great soon too. I know that posting this on here was probably silly, but I was so lost, and didnt have anyone to turn to. Thank you all for being honest. He isn't going to be a daddy to my children, the police are looking for him, and they tell me I am not the first, but I need to be the last. I was scared to call the cops, I didn't think they would believe me, but they are doing more than I could have ever asked for... thank you all so much. never again will i stay, and i never will return...

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Answered by kCharleneS - Feb. 9, 2013 7:05am

Good for you. I'm glad that you're taking the right road with this and doing what is right for you and your babies. Good luck and hope things look up from here.

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