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Category: Labour & Delivery

Asked by PaperHeart

Q: How much say?

How much say should the father have in who is allowed in the delivery room? This is our third and we've always been adamant about it just being the two of us in the delivery room, which was controversial with my mom when I had my first. Having had the experience twice, I know that my Dh isn't actually a great source of support as he goes into some weird trance and becomes quiet and useless. I labored overnight with our second and he slept until about 8 am when I finally asked him to wake up and sit with me :-/. He's typically good about being attentive when I'm sick, but just downright sucks during L&D. He's not my mom's greatest fan, however, though most of his gripes are more like grudges at this point. Anyway, my change of heart in having anyone else in the room is a total 180 from my past feelings, so it took him off guard, but he insists he'll stay home if she's there. I think he's being selfish since I'll be the one stuck in a hospital bed, but don't want to step on his toes.

This question was asked Sep. 25, 2015 4:14pm
Category: Labour & Delivery

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Answers (12)

Answered by PaperHeart - Sep. 25, 2015 11:53pm
No, I wouldn't have the heart to actually let someone else in and disclude my mom. I'm typically pretty laid back during labor. I'm quiet and withdrawn when I'm in pain. I usually get an epidural, though, and then it's just like hanging out. That said, I'm not one of those 5 hours start to finish women. I'm usually in labor for a good 12 or more hours. It just worked out that my water broke around 9:30 pm with my dd, so everyone was tired. My parents and mother in law both came to the hospital, which I didn't expect given the hour and the fact that my hospital is about 3 hours from them. I felt oddly obligated to let them sleep, but just couldn't sleep myself. I will very likely not be in a rush to get to the hospital this time around and will do some laboring from home. I think where I really would like the most actual support is during the pushing phase (took under 30 minutes with my dd and about 5 with my ds). My Dh is just completely a different person at that time. It's weird.

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Answered by tashagraham - Sep. 27, 2015 8:08am
Can you have more than one person there?

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