Questions & Answers

I think you have to account for the fact that everything in life has a "first-time" excitement factor. I'm sure it's not that he doesn't care, but just like you now, he's been there and done that, and honestly, it's probably not as fun for the person who has to pick up all of our slack and do the extra work and extra running! Men worry about money and carry around their own stress about providing for yet another human being; don't forget they have their own set of stresses that are separate from our own. My husband still talks to the belly and stuff, but doesn't seem to be as super excited as the first time, and I find that very normal and human. I wouldn't worry about it.

You know, that may be it. Since we have had our son, I keep saying I want 3 kids and he says he wants 2. Now I wonder if maybe he's on the fence thinking about this maybe not being our last pregnancy! Maybe he's worried I will get baby fever again and he will seriously not want anymore. It doesn't help that one of his good friends is going through a divorce right now because his wife wanted another baby and he doesn't. I don't know how to bring this up with him, though. Right now, with this pregnancy I have had thoughts about if I could handle 3 because I know 2 will be a lot of work. So, right now I kind of agree with him. But, how do I know that I won't want another one in the future? I don't want to tell him I agree and change my mind, but I also know I would never leave him if he was adamant on only 2. Ugh.

Maybe he's struggling with knowing what he needs to do. Have you tried sitting your SO down and just talking about how the pregnancy is going with him and asking what he thinks you two could do to make this pregnancy special?

He doesn't say much, just when I am tired that I should take a nap when our son does and when I'm not feeling good I just get a "oooohhh" I know there is nothing either one of us can do, just kind of want a little recognition of sorts. Our son had gotten sick and therefore had gotten me sick when I was 6 weeks and he said and did nothing. Again, not much he can do, which is why I feel like I may be just being hormonal. I almost feel left out if that makes sense. He is a wonderful husband and I know he's not trying to make me feel like this, but I am afraid to tell him how I feel because I don't want him to brush me off or think I am crazy lol.

To me it sounds like a little of all three. Men seem to think we're pros the second time around and should have nothing to complain about. On the flip side, I think we tend to think that we're doing all this "suffering" agaaaaain and that we should get some rewards for it. . . which never seems to happen :( What does he think about the way you're feeling?