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JaxyBoBaxy's Pregnancy
My Due Date: August 23, 2015I am postpartum » My due date was more than 2 weeks ago
Age: 36 years old
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Entry 001: Blast-off
By JaxyBoBaxy » Posted Dec. 18, 2014 12:37pm - 352 views - 1 comment
I'm going to have fun with this journal:
Last night, I was feeling pretty uncomfortable and had been experiencing symptoms that were both new and deeply troubling. The very tips of my nipples felt as though they'd been ground into skin flakes and the sheer volume of drool on my pillows resembled a child's swimming pool. I hadn't had these problems before, I thought.
My husband and I had only just started our attempts to create a hybrid clone from a combination of his DNA and mine. Every scrap of intelligence gathered indicated that such an endeavor would take several months and even then, such an undertaking might not bear fruit.
It was perhaps the third hour of searching the kitchen in a frenzied state for the source of an odor newly offensive to what can only be described as a violently aggressive gain in olfactory perception that I suspected these new senses could be blamed on a change in hormone secretion. I did nothing with the realization immediately, but rather allowed it to sit in the back of my mind and stew.
By the evening though, around when someone attempted to communicate with me and I found myself staring at their flapping orifice, unable to make sense of the noises they grunted in my general direction, I decided that it was worth looking into the possibility that my hormonal levels had undergone some type of change.
I had purchased one package of hormonal level test devices, but I couldn't remember where I had decided to store them. After some frantic searching, and after several admittedly terrible misclassifications were made of my husband's ability to put items away, I retrieved the package and set about performing the necessary tests. I realized soon though that my urine sample would be too dilute to give an accurate reading and I should thus collect it in a receptacle to determine whether the concentration was adequate to even perform any such test on. I couldn't locate one and thus, decided to use the presumably unused plastic cup that came with a container of Pepto-Bismal I had purchased recently. Understanding that the cup was not sterile, but lacking the patience to insist that I have a sterile receptacle, I rinsed the cup with water and judged it to be adequate.
Though the device was calibrated to determine current hormonal levels in 3 minutes, my device returned a determination in less than a minute. Positive for hCG levels exceeding 25 mlu/ml. Certainly, this was good news worthy of celebrating. Before I could deliver the report to my husband and co-pilot though, a realization came over me - the receptacle I had used was not, in fact, sterile. Did Pepto-Bismal contain any hCG? Was it a safe judgment call to use such an item and then claim confidence in the results it produced? I had made a slight miscalculation. Deciding that the validity of the results were more important than conservation of the hormonal test devices, I took the second of the package and tested a more direct sample instead of one collected in a potentially contaminated receptacle. The results were the same.
Assured of the validity, I shared this news with my husband and co-pilot to which he responded by sitting in silence for over 8 minutes. The news had short-circuited his ability to comprehend and reason. He asked for clarification twice and it was given. Mouth agape and eyes wide, he nodded and responded, "That's cool," which is assumed to be a positive affirmation that the plan is on course.
Today, my co-pilot's ability to hear has somehow been compromised as he is unresponsive to verbal commands and his vocabulary has been limited to approximately 30 words. I am hoping his senses will soon rebound and we will be able to continue the mission unimpeded.
My Journal
Entry 001: Blast-off
By JaxyBoBaxy » Posted Dec. 18, 2014 12:37pm - 352 views - 1 comment
I'm going to have fun with this journal:
Last night, I was feeling pretty uncomfortable and had been experiencing symptoms that were both new and deeply troubling. The very tips of my nipples felt as though they'd been ground into skin flakes and the sheer volume of drool on my pillows resembled a child's swimming pool. I hadn't had these problems before, I thought.
My husband and I had only just started our attempts to create a hybrid clone from a combination of his DNA and mine. Every scrap of intelligence gathered indicated that such an endeavor would take several months and even then, such an undertaking might not bear fruit.
It was perhaps the third hour of searching the kitchen in a frenzied state for the source of an odor newly offensive to what can only be described as a violently aggressive gain in olfactory perception that I suspected these new senses could be blamed on a change in hormone secretion. I did nothing with the realization immediately, but rather allowed it to sit in the back of my mind and stew.
By the evening though, around when someone attempted to communicate with me and I found myself staring at their flapping orifice, unable to make sense of the noises they grunted in my general direction, I decided that it was worth looking into the possibility that my hormonal levels had undergone some type of change.
I had purchased one package of hormonal level test devices, but I couldn't remember where I had decided to store them. After some frantic searching, and after several admittedly terrible misclassifications were made of my husband's ability to put items away, I retrieved the package and set about performing the necessary tests. I realized soon though that my urine sample would be too dilute to give an accurate reading and I should thus collect it in a receptacle to determine whether the concentration was adequate to even perform any such test on. I couldn't locate one and thus, decided to use the presumably unused plastic cup that came with a container of Pepto-Bismal I had purchased recently. Understanding that the cup was not sterile, but lacking the patience to insist that I have a sterile receptacle, I rinsed the cup with water and judged it to be adequate.
Though the device was calibrated to determine current hormonal levels in 3 minutes, my device returned a determination in less than a minute. Positive for hCG levels exceeding 25 mlu/ml. Certainly, this was good news worthy of celebrating. Before I could deliver the report to my husband and co-pilot though, a realization came over me - the receptacle I had used was not, in fact, sterile. Did Pepto-Bismal contain any hCG? Was it a safe judgment call to use such an item and then claim confidence in the results it produced? I had made a slight miscalculation. Deciding that the validity of the results were more important than conservation of the hormonal test devices, I took the second of the package and tested a more direct sample instead of one collected in a potentially contaminated receptacle. The results were the same.
Assured of the validity, I shared this news with my husband and co-pilot to which he responded by sitting in silence for over 8 minutes. The news had short-circuited his ability to comprehend and reason. He asked for clarification twice and it was given. Mouth agape and eyes wide, he nodded and responded, "That's cool," which is assumed to be a positive affirmation that the plan is on course.
Today, my co-pilot's ability to hear has somehow been compromised as he is unresponsive to verbal commands and his vocabulary has been limited to approximately 30 words. I am hoping his senses will soon rebound and we will be able to continue the mission unimpeded.
Comments for this Journal Entry
 | Comment from RedBetty » Posted Dec. 18, 2014 1:36pm I haven't read a journal entry like this one, that's for sure. Had me in giggles. Sure we are talking about pregnancy symptoms and taking hpts or something else? Lol I hope your co-pilot regains his ability to communicate and discovers a sudden expansion to his vocabulary so we can have more of your mission entries as it unfold :)) Big congrats on your bfp. x |
