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Lozie84's Pregnancy
My Due Date: October 9, 2013I have given birth!
Age: 40 years old
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the arrival of my niece
By Lozie84 » Posted Jun. 20, 2013 11:20pm - 172 views - 1 comment
so at 37 weeks, my sister had had more then enough of being pregnant. she HATES being pregnant. last week they told her the baby weighed 3.7kgs or 8lb 1ou. She asked the obgyn to take the baby out then since bubs was a good weight so early. the obg stood strong on refusing her request and said she had to wait until 38 weeks for her booked caesar, they dont take them out any earlier for no reason. so this annoyed my sister very much. she started asking everyone how they induced their labors and yesterday afternoon decided to drink castor oil. the castor oil had the desired effect a few hours later. waters broke and off to the hosp. she did end up getting her c section, but had to experience contractions for the first and last time. in the very early hours of the morning Darby Elizabeth was born... get this weighing 4.6kgs or 10lb1ou!!!!! they are both well. Darby has a black eye and bump on her head from the tools used to get her out in the c section.
im excited shes here, and yet these overwhelming feelings of sadness have risen again. i have wanted this to be me for so long. and since i am pregnant i didnt think i'd feel it anymore. but here it is. its ugly head of jealousy. i hate that i feel this. i am truly happy for my sister and i love my niece but it feels like right now im not feeling it 100% like i should be :( i wish i could "snap out of it" like i keep telling myself. but it doesnt seem to be working.
im looking forward to meeting bubs in a few hours and hopefully that'll make things better and not worse.
110 days to go til my due date. right now that just seems forever away :( but i want her to stay in there cooking nicely. grow "coco" grow. and then come meet your mummy who loves you more then life itself!
My Journal
the arrival of my niece
By Lozie84 » Posted Jun. 20, 2013 11:20pm - 172 views - 1 comment
so at 37 weeks, my sister had had more then enough of being pregnant. she HATES being pregnant. last week they told her the baby weighed 3.7kgs or 8lb 1ou. She asked the obgyn to take the baby out then since bubs was a good weight so early. the obg stood strong on refusing her request and said she had to wait until 38 weeks for her booked caesar, they dont take them out any earlier for no reason. so this annoyed my sister very much. she started asking everyone how they induced their labors and yesterday afternoon decided to drink castor oil. the castor oil had the desired effect a few hours later. waters broke and off to the hosp. she did end up getting her c section, but had to experience contractions for the first and last time. in the very early hours of the morning Darby Elizabeth was born... get this weighing 4.6kgs or 10lb1ou!!!!! they are both well. Darby has a black eye and bump on her head from the tools used to get her out in the c section.
im excited shes here, and yet these overwhelming feelings of sadness have risen again. i have wanted this to be me for so long. and since i am pregnant i didnt think i'd feel it anymore. but here it is. its ugly head of jealousy. i hate that i feel this. i am truly happy for my sister and i love my niece but it feels like right now im not feeling it 100% like i should be :( i wish i could "snap out of it" like i keep telling myself. but it doesnt seem to be working.
im looking forward to meeting bubs in a few hours and hopefully that'll make things better and not worse.
110 days to go til my due date. right now that just seems forever away :( but i want her to stay in there cooking nicely. grow "coco" grow. and then come meet your mummy who loves you more then life itself!
Comments for this Journal Entry
 | Comment from Quartz3 » Posted Jun. 21, 2013 10:42am The way I see it, it's okay to be jealous. We can't always help how we feel. It's good that you're recognizing this as jealousy and not denying your feelings. What's important is that you don't let jealousy dictate your actions; and because you say you're happy for your sister and you love your niece, it doesn't sound like that's your case. |
