Questions & Answers

I'm sorry for completely disagreeing with you other ladies... but If he can let something get to the point of physical contact now...things are only going to reach this point sooner once the baby comes..and as time goes by. I was in this spot while pregnant with my first(now my EX)..Once turned into twice..He was sorry..then it turned into choking...then it turned into holding me down..throwing me down..throwing things at me..nearly breaking my arm..choking while throwing me.... UMMMMMM Once turned into several times..and it got to a point that I felt stuck. I had let it go once..and felt stupid telling anybody.. because it mentally began screwing with my perfectly logical thinking. I couldn't think anymore.
You are at your most vulnerable spot now! Pregnant..you are most fragile NOW..If he can hurt you and look past that now..IT WILL ONLY GET WORSE...I PROMISE! I KNOW FOR A FACT. THEY CAN NOT TURN THE SWITCH OFF..IT DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY.. REGARDLESS OF HOW NICE HER NORMALLY IS.

Hun..It took one really random day of sitting in my sorrow watching non other then OPRAH. this story popped up one day..I had seen it before and thought..."what stupid lady stays for that crap"...But this particular day...I saw it from the victims eyes, heart, and soul..Please take a look at it..look up her story through google after watching this...PLEASE. Get yourself away now! I'm praying for you. You need to have a zero tolerance for any abuse..emotional, mental, physical! God Bless
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Clt8n-UvBSQ

wow! If he hits you once he will hit you twice. I would be going to stay with some other family members if i were you..

Really? Throwing a fork is just as bad as slapping someone? R u kidding me? Anyways, I think you really need to think about what is best for you and your baby, if he's starting now, how will it be when the baby is born? Also will he take his anger out on the baby? Maybe get some councling to help you deal with this.

Ok I am going to answer this question from the unborn babies stand point. My father was very abusive to my mother once she became pregnant. He was also an alcoholic and would turn abusive when he was drunk. Sometimes... its not worth it staying with the father because you have a child together. The stress my mom went through because of the abuse because she not only had the physical abuse led to me having a lot of health problems even to this day. There was a time he even went off so bad that he hit my mom in the belly when she was 8 months pregnant with me. I have had health problems / mental issues galore ever since birth. Its NOT worth it. I have lived 31 years of my life struggling with multiple issues. Then once I was born the incident that it took for her to leave him was him throwing me, yes throwing me, in my hair chair and knocking it over. While I don't remember a lot of these things (some i actually do) ...

oh dear hunny hope your ok x have you tried to talk to him since? is he the type of man you can openly talk to?

Looney..I respect a lot of your different ways(your potty training..and frankly uniqueness to growing children..:))
..but..combating a situation like this with sarcasm..not good. This girl is looking for advice and I'm sure she wasn't looking for women to come on her arguing. I think there was enough of that for her and that's why she is on here asking for advice. I dont think anybody on here is condoning any violence..I will say..that men are genetically built to be stronger, faster, more intimidating by nature..There for putting women in a dissipation to feel helpless. So when I man threatens with words and it quickly escalates to physically hitting something out of your hands...they are showing no boundaries and or restrain from there on out. Throwing the fork was out of fear..I think that that is obvious here. Not ok..but..when your threatened, your first reactions aren't gonna be the most thought out. Ive had schooling in the counseling too.:)

throwing a fork is just like hitting someone, and if the cops came you wouldve been arrested as well...i threw my cell phone at my DH and I got arrested for domestic violence, he dropped charges but cop said "YOU PROVOKED HIM BY HITTING HIM WITH A CELL PHONE FIRST" "YOU ASKED FOR IT" and thats not true at all...and was ignorant on cops behalf but still in the eyes of the law thats how it works!!
VIOLENCE IS NOT THE ANSWER! BOTH OF YOU WERE WRONG! YOU NEED TO GET OUT!! GO STAY WITH A FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER THERE IS NOOOOO EXCUSE FOR YOU TO STAY!! IT WILL NOT STOP!! NO MATTER HOUW MUCH YOU WANT TO BELIEVE IT WILL..HES NOT SORRY HE WILL HIT YOU AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN!! how long before he starts abusing your child???

Please don't think you're an idiot for throwing a fork at him. I might have thrown something at my DH if he behaved that way too. He still had no right to hit you....there's no excuse for that. The other ladies here have given you lots of good advice. Just don't think that his behavior is okay. If he does it once, it's very likely that he'll do it again. You have more than just yourself to think of now. Just something to keep in mind. I wish you all the best.

Often, verbal and physical abuse starts in pregnancy in relationships that have never been abusive before. The strain that pregnancy puts on a relationship plus your vulnerable condition makes you an easy target. As the others have said, it's important to spot the signs early and make sure you can get out quickly if you need to. There are lots of charities that offer confidential advice for victims of domestic abuse, which will be very used to speaking to and helping pregnant women. Maybe wait until a time when your partner is out and call one of them to get some professional advice. Also, talk to a member of your family or a close friend about it; it's really important not to shut other people out because you feel embarrassed.

I really hope you get the support you need, wishing you all the best.