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Category: Newly Pregnant

Asked by Bailher

Q: Young and doubtful

Hi, I'm Bailey. I had my first ultrasound the other day. I'm 6 weeks along and I'm due September 9th. I'll be 17 when I have my baby and will still have a semester left of high school. Every time I see a commercial with babies and kids in it, it just really depresses me. Because I'm going to be having a kid so young. I feel so terrible bringing a baby into the world without having a dad. I'm afraid that I'm going to be alone for awhile because of this.. I have a lot of support from my friends, mom and family, but I'm still doubtful that I can really do this.. I'm still just a kid myself.. Some days I'm sort of excited to have a baby, and other days, I'm extremely depressed and want to terminate the pregnancy (which I can't afford). My job is only giving me 7-8 hours a week.. I definitely cant afford to have this baby if I cant afford an abortion.. I don't know what to do or what to think to try and feel better. I hate myself more and more everyday. This is exhausting... Any advice? :(

This question was asked Jan. 18, 2015 4:49am
Category: Newly Pregnant

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Answers (24)

Answered by stickybean1976 - Jan. 18, 2015 6:21am

I agree with estone. Sounds like you need professional counselling. I understand you really young but.... Woman on this site have been trying to get pregnant for a long long time and a lot of us have lost many babies in the past. The word abortion does not go down on this site. If you need pregnancy advise we are all totally here to guide and support you and answer any questions you may have. But saying you don't have the money to have an abortion.
It sounds like you have the support of your friends and family but if you choose to give up your baby there's other options beside termination. As you will of seen on the ultrasound you had your baby has a heartbeat.

You should definitely speak with someone who specialises in teen pregnancy and your Mum.
It's a tough situation for you so young and I wish you luck in making the right choices for you and your baby.

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Answered by tjwjtw21 - Jan. 18, 2015 7:09pm

I don't disagree with abortion, but I also don't think it should be used as a form of birth control. I think there is a time and a place for it (like rape). Adoption is a BEAUTIFUL thing and whats great about it these days is you can make it what YOU want. If you want to know your child, you can. Maybe consider someone in your family to care for your child until you get together enough to do it for yourself. There are so MANY options in the world of adoption. Yeah- maybe you will have stretch marks or something, but your body isn't "ruined" by having a baby. It recovers and heals, and like previous posters- you can help it along. It is what you make of it!! I TRULY wish the best for you and your baby and hope that whatever you choose, it a choice you had professional help making and one that you can live with FOREVER. Best wishes hun!!

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Answered by estone - Jan. 18, 2015 5:30am

I would recommend seeing a therapist? Someone to talk to, as you are going through so many changes and being pregnant is no cake walk. Your hormones make you even crazier. If at the end, you feel that you cannot support the baby, you can always give him/her up for adoption too. Good luck to you.

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

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Answered by monroezelda - Jan. 18, 2015 12:08pm

My bf mum had 2 babies at 17 my sister had her first at 17 and they were scared and had these same concerns, if you have supportive friends or family Im sure they will be there for you.
Personally I dont agree with abortion but I have never been in a situation were it would cross my mind. Fortunatley in the uk we have the nhs an a benefit system that helps people who work on a loe wage out. I would really suggest talking to as many people as you can for advice but only you can make that choice in the end as it was you who made this baby. I hope you get the guidance you need. X

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

202 out of 400 found this answer helpful

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

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Answered by Bailher - Jan. 18, 2015 5:34pm

I dont have the strength or money to support a baby. I had plans.. I was going to join the military and become a nurse.. If I keep the baby, I will never be able to accomplish my goals and dreams. And there's no way I'm going through months and months of pain and misery just to destroy my body and give somebody else my baby. I just cant. I know that sounds selfish.. but I'm 16. Of course I'm going to be concerned about my body. I mean I'm already overweight and unattractive enough as is, why would i want to just ruin it even more? I feel bad for feeling and saying all this but I cant stop. I cant view this any differently. There is literally NOTHING good about being 16 and pregnant from a one night stand.. I'm never going to get a man. I'll never be able to go to college. I'll struggle and be unhappy my entire life, just like my mom did and god, I do NOT want that..

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Answered by mandy. - Jan. 18, 2015 12:28pm

Your doubts and worries are normal for any pregnant woman regardless of your age, Yes you need to seek advice about all the options available to you. You are very lucky to have a supportive family and friends, Talk to your Mum about what you are feeling she may not of been your age when she was pregnant for the first time but I am sure she felt some of the things you are feeling!

I know there are so many women on this site that have put everything into making a baby, and many that have lost them. But I do not think we should be giving our opinion's on what we believe is right or wrong! The right thing to do is an individuals choice. Good Luck!

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