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traumaqueen's Pregnancy
My Due Date: June 28, 2019I am postpartum » My due date was more than 2 weeks ago
Age: 42 years old
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A new chapter!
By traumaqueen » Posted Oct. 24, 2018 4:29pm - 359 views - 1 comment
Drew and I have been trying since January for another baby. We had a chemical pregnancy in June followed by our most recent BFP Oct. 12th.
The one year anniversary of my mom's passing was Oct. 8th, followed by my dad's birthday Oct. 11th and then a trip to Iowa Oct. 13 & 14 to scatter mom's ashes. I can't help but feel like this little peanut is a gift straight from Heaven and that my mom had a LOT to do with it!
Unfortunately, I started feeling some cramping last night and it's continued today. We're going to check a repeat HCG level today and an A1c as my fasting blood sugars have been greater than 130 all week. I've got a LOT of anxiety right now that this little peanut isn't going to stick. I feel extremely pregnant and I do believe we have our baby and that it will be a successful pregnancy, I'm just second guessing my instincts, I think. It's one of those "what if it's too good to be true" type things, I think. I was hoping that by journaling today, I could help to get rid of some of these fears and paranoia, as it does usually help calm my nerves.
I keep praying for peace of mind - if it's the Lord's will...we're pregnant with our 3rd and final baby and it will be a healthy, wonderful pregnancy. If this peanut isn't meant to stick, it's also the Lord's will, as his timing and knowledge of what's best for us and our family is perfect. If the baby isn't meant to be at this time, I keep praying for peace and calm. As I pray, I do feel calm and reassured, but no idea if that's because I'm calm cuz baby is gonna stick, or calm from the Lord's reassurance that it'll be okay, no matter what.
I'm going to load my kids up here shortly and head to town to go get my blood drawn. Hopefully it won't take too terrible long to get the results to the clinic!
My Journal
A new chapter!
By traumaqueen » Posted Oct. 24, 2018 4:29pm - 359 views - 1 comment
Drew and I have been trying since January for another baby. We had a chemical pregnancy in June followed by our most recent BFP Oct. 12th.
The one year anniversary of my mom's passing was Oct. 8th, followed by my dad's birthday Oct. 11th and then a trip to Iowa Oct. 13 & 14 to scatter mom's ashes. I can't help but feel like this little peanut is a gift straight from Heaven and that my mom had a LOT to do with it!
Unfortunately, I started feeling some cramping last night and it's continued today. We're going to check a repeat HCG level today and an A1c as my fasting blood sugars have been greater than 130 all week. I've got a LOT of anxiety right now that this little peanut isn't going to stick. I feel extremely pregnant and I do believe we have our baby and that it will be a successful pregnancy, I'm just second guessing my instincts, I think. It's one of those "what if it's too good to be true" type things, I think. I was hoping that by journaling today, I could help to get rid of some of these fears and paranoia, as it does usually help calm my nerves.
I keep praying for peace of mind - if it's the Lord's will...we're pregnant with our 3rd and final baby and it will be a healthy, wonderful pregnancy. If this peanut isn't meant to stick, it's also the Lord's will, as his timing and knowledge of what's best for us and our family is perfect. If the baby isn't meant to be at this time, I keep praying for peace and calm. As I pray, I do feel calm and reassured, but no idea if that's because I'm calm cuz baby is gonna stick, or calm from the Lord's reassurance that it'll be okay, no matter what.
I'm going to load my kids up here shortly and head to town to go get my blood drawn. Hopefully it won't take too terrible long to get the results to the clinic!
Comments for this Journal Entry
 | Comment from aprilluvsmoz » Posted Oct. 24, 2018 8:28pm Congratulations! Sending you best wishes for a healthy and happy pregnancy |
