Need Advice? Ask Your Question

Questions & Answers

Category: Nutrition, Weight & Fitness

Asked by alwaysdreaming

Q: Advice on whether or not I should look for another doctor.

Background info: Tomorrow I will be 20 weeks. I am overweight and have been pretty much all my life. This will be my third pregnancy. Before being pregnant (due to weight issues) I had high blood pressure and other health issues (social anxiety & depression...)

I went to an appointment today, which I was already dreading because I was afraid of getting yelled at again by my doctor. I was afraid that I had gained weight and of course if I did he would be upset with me. I gained 2 lbs in the last month. As usual my blood pressure was a bit higher than it should be. Part of this I think is due to my anxiety levels at my fear of being in the doctors office period. He asked me what I was going to do about it. I said I don't know. He then said to me, "You gained more weight. I don't want you to gain anything. I want you to lose weight." I said I don't want to do that while pregnant though. His response was, "I don't care." I'm afraid now its too late to find anothe

This question was asked Oct. 29, 2014 2:33am
Category: Nutrition, Weight & Fitness

Answer This Question

Answers (7)

Answered by alwaysdreaming - Oct. 29, 2014 7:33pm

I wanted to update everyone that I have made an appointment with a wonderful midwife. I feel so much better now, and I am completely confident in things now. Thank you everyone for the kind words and support.

220 out of 458 found this answer helpful

Was this answer helpful? Yes No

Answered by Fitbyjordan - Oct. 29, 2014 2:31pm

I think you should look for another doctor. You shouldn't feel like that when you go in for a happy time in your life. Shame on the doctor for making you feel horrible about yourself. He can talk to you about weight loss without making you feel bad and make you dread coming to see him. I gained 20-25 in 3 months after my miscarriage and I am newly pregnant again, when I saw my doctor she talked to me about my weight but was not harsh to me. Together we made a plan to help my weight this pregnancy. Doctors should be a person who makes you feel safe, not horrible. I am sorry this is happening to you!

218 out of 431 found this answer helpful

Was this answer helpful? Yes No

Answered by alwaysdreaming - Oct. 29, 2014 6:30am

I thank you both for the support and advice. I appreciate it so much and really needed it. I have been crying ever since I got home today from the appointment, wishing I never even got pregnant...At this point I don't know I feel safe (to be honest) with him delivering for me. I think I am going to seek some form of alternative care and maybe set up a consultation with a midwife for prenatal care at least for now.

220 out of 447 found this answer helpful

Was this answer helpful? Yes No

Answered by alwaysdreaming - Oct. 29, 2014 6:27am

As far as everything is concerned in my ultrasounds, everything is good. The baby was actually too small for detailed scans when I was in there last so I was scheduled for another one in about 4 weeks. As far as I know, everything is fine. I might add my blood pressure does increase when I go to any doctors office because I used to be at the point I couldn't even leave my house and go anywhere alone. I forced myself through that but as a result my anxiety is always high and I think that increases my blood pressure due to the stress it causes me to be out and about. Also my blood pressure was literally 2 over the the point that puts you in stage 1 high blood pressure. Mind you it used to be much much higher. I get losing weight from diet and some mild form of exercise as well and I am more than for that; however, the doctor I go to made it clear I am to more or less focus on just losing weight for the sole purpose of losing weight. I have gained 7 lbs since the start of my pregnancy...

221 out of 434 found this answer helpful

Was this answer helpful? Yes No

Answered by Ladysg - Oct. 29, 2014 6:01am

Oh but he's cruel...that is not a nice thing to say...at all. Yes...maybe he's worried that you gaining weight is putting you and the baby at risk but really....dieting and exercising during pregnancy...I have never heard of that.

If seriously you are uncomfortable with him...you can still change your doctor. It's not too late. Have friends or family recommend a good doctor that they've used and try him/her. I can't imagine going to such a person for my check-ups. He makes me so angry...

I'd suggest the same as Emz1989...eat smaller meals (choose healthier options) and lots of water. Try just walking for exercise (just to keep fit...not to lose weight).

I'm also a lil overweight...after my thyroid op I gained like a whooping 25 kilograms (and this was before I got pregnant). My midwife is not too overly concerned as yet. Just advised I watch what I eat and get in regular exercise (like walking, swimming, preggie yoga).

All the best hun xxxx

222 out of 447 found this answer helpful

Was this answer helpful? Yes No

Answered by Emz1989 - Oct. 29, 2014 5:08am

I know exactly how you feel. I to am overweight and sometimes I notice doctors can be very forward but in a hurtful way . Maybe its tough love but its not the kind of support us women should be getting. We already know we are overweight we don't need a reminder every time. Stick to nutritious foods. Eat little often. Drink plenty of water. I find that helps . Just listen to his advice but don't take his bull either. Remember your half way there...... it'll be all worth it in the end ð???

218 out of 451 found this answer helpful

Was this answer helpful? Yes No

Answered by alwaysdreaming - Oct. 29, 2014 2:37am

I also wanted to add that he advised me that I should be dieting and exercising to lose weight at this point. I guess my biggest issue is his response to what I said and his non-caring attitude and obvious disgust with my weight. I understand watching my diet should be an issue which is what I do anyways but I wasn't aware that it was wise to start exercising and actively trying to lose weight during pregnancy which is what he advised me to do today. I always pointed out how I broke my toe recently (being clumsy) and that was part of the reason for me being less active. He advised me to take an anti-inflammatory. Are you even allowed to take them when pregnant? I just feel like he would be happier if my pregnancy ended in a lose so he would not have to deliver a baby from someone as "big" as me. The issue now is since I am so far along, most doctor's will refuse to take me so what do I do?

230 out of 453 found this answer helpful

Was this answer helpful? Yes No

1

Answer This Question

You are not logged in.
Log in or Register to post an answer to this question.

Other Questions in Nutrition, Weight & Fitness