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vesper's Pregnancy
My Due Date: March 26, 2014I am postpartum » My due date was more than 2 weeks ago
Age: 47 years old
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Pregnancy 10 - 4w3d
By vesper » Posted Jul. 20, 2013 11:32am - 142 views - 0 comments
I slept with less quality than I would have liked and so I feel overly tired today and kind of "meh" as far as emotions go. Physically I'm a bit tired, but also a bit "meh" in that regard. The excited high I was on yesterday has mellowed a little bit. Not every day can be an amazing day with such good news. There are a lot of days in pregnancy that are just... days. I hope that I will have the chance to follow this all the way through.
One part of me feels like "This is it!!!" and the other part of me remembers all too vividly that I've made it to 7.5 weeks last Summer and things did not go well at that point despite that it started out going decently. The numbers from last Summer showed a slow increase during the first interval, and a normal and good increase in the second interval, and yet there was no heartbeat found all the same. I imagine that's what's often called a missed miscarriage where the body isn't aware that the baby isn't alive.
So basically I'm not out of the woods yet. I have to see a heartbeat for that to happen. I have an appointment on July 30th and they warned me that since I will be one day shy of 6 weeks we may or may not see a heartbeat at that point. From all that I studied about things - that's probably very correct. It would be really nice if we did see one, but I won't give up just because we might not at that very early point. They will likely want to check the following week or two.
Quite frankly, I worry that there won't be a heartbeat and it will be yet another loss, and yet another disappointment. I always start out vowing not to get my hopes up and to remain pessimistic, but I just can't do it when good news comes along... and then later I crash hard. It's a tough roller coaster ride. I want this to work so much.... but part of me wonders if I'll ever see a second trimester again.
There is also the matter of the Umbilical Hernia that has cropped back up. I'm not sure what to do about this since I'm currently pregnant. For the moment I'm not going to do anything really. There aren't many things I CAN do. However - I really wish someone had explained things better the first time I had this repaired. I find myself a little irked that they didn't.
My Journal
Pregnancy 10 - 4w3d
By vesper » Posted Jul. 20, 2013 11:32am - 142 views - 0 comments
I slept with less quality than I would have liked and so I feel overly tired today and kind of "meh" as far as emotions go. Physically I'm a bit tired, but also a bit "meh" in that regard. The excited high I was on yesterday has mellowed a little bit. Not every day can be an amazing day with such good news. There are a lot of days in pregnancy that are just... days. I hope that I will have the chance to follow this all the way through.
One part of me feels like "This is it!!!" and the other part of me remembers all too vividly that I've made it to 7.5 weeks last Summer and things did not go well at that point despite that it started out going decently. The numbers from last Summer showed a slow increase during the first interval, and a normal and good increase in the second interval, and yet there was no heartbeat found all the same. I imagine that's what's often called a missed miscarriage where the body isn't aware that the baby isn't alive.
So basically I'm not out of the woods yet. I have to see a heartbeat for that to happen. I have an appointment on July 30th and they warned me that since I will be one day shy of 6 weeks we may or may not see a heartbeat at that point. From all that I studied about things - that's probably very correct. It would be really nice if we did see one, but I won't give up just because we might not at that very early point. They will likely want to check the following week or two.
Quite frankly, I worry that there won't be a heartbeat and it will be yet another loss, and yet another disappointment. I always start out vowing not to get my hopes up and to remain pessimistic, but I just can't do it when good news comes along... and then later I crash hard. It's a tough roller coaster ride. I want this to work so much.... but part of me wonders if I'll ever see a second trimester again.
There is also the matter of the Umbilical Hernia that has cropped back up. I'm not sure what to do about this since I'm currently pregnant. For the moment I'm not going to do anything really. There aren't many things I CAN do. However - I really wish someone had explained things better the first time I had this repaired. I find myself a little irked that they didn't.
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