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Joined Jan. 1, 2014 9:45pm

Eluria88's Pregnancy

My Due Date: September 1, 2014
I have given birth!
Age: 35 years old
Location: Portland, United States

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Not sure when to tell family
By Eluria88 » Posted Mar. 5, 2014 10:27am - 319 views - 2 comments

Still holding off on telling the family. I want to feel that everything is okay first and still not there yet.
Still nervous that I'm not showing any signs of being pregnant. Everyone else seems to have these round obvious baby bumps at 14 weeks and I'm still flat as a board. Part of me thinks I may have to wait until I start feeling kicks around 20 weeks or so before I will feel confident that the baby isn't dead.

My oldest son is turning 6 on March 27th and we're going out to pizza with the entire family. I have considered telling them then since everyone will be in one spot at the same time, but I'm still worried it's too early. I don't know how people tell people when they're only 4-5 weeks, I'm nervous to share anything even 10 weeks later. By then I will be around 17 weeks. I have a doctor's appointment on March 20th, so maybe that appointment will give me enough info to feel comfortable sharing. We still haven't been able to hear the heartbeat and that worries me. I guess if they hear a heartbeat on the 20th it should be safe to tell people on the 27th. Just nervous that they may not be able to find it still. We've seen it on ultrasound, but never heard it on doppler.

I guess I just wish I was like everyone else. Wish I was happy, excited and showing a bump. I wish I wasn't terrified of losing another child and having to tell everyone through tears that my baby was dead. I'm not sure when it's considered safe. I guess it never really is. I could lose this baby at 30 weeks for all I know, I just hate the fear and dread. I want to feel pregnant.

Comments for this Journal Entry

Comment from lyssa7872 » Posted Mar. 5, 2014 4:10pm
Ive never had a miscarriage so I don't know what you're going thru, but being one of those people who told everyone at 4 weeks, the day after getting a positive test, I can tell you what goes thru my mind :) I don't want to pretend there isn't life there. Even though it may end, it may end for any of us at any time. I want the baby to be loved as long as it lives, and I want the support if anything happens. That being said, you may never have a cute bump. I didn't until I was like 30 weeks with my son. I never feel great during a pregnancy. Both times I've been sick the whoooole way thru (so far). So for me, waiting til I feel and look pregnant or great is a day may never come :P However, Kaylia is so right. You tell everyone when you feel right. Maybe it's a spur of the moment call to one person, maybe it's an email to everyone, a facebook post, or a dinner. Doesn't matter as long as it's something you want to do :)

Comment from kaylia2oo5 » Posted Mar. 5, 2014 10:32am
We've seen both of these twins' heartbeats twice on the ultrasound now. My prenatal clinic won't even try to pick the heartbeat up until 12w. I had my first appointment on Monday after that 12w mark and they couldn't pick them up. The Dr said that especially if you've had kiddos before, that the baby still has enough room to move around quite a bit and it makes it really hard to actually pick the heartbeat up.

I know how you feel with the worrying though- we miscarried in 2011 and it makes you worry for every pregnancy after. I figured I wouldn't worry as much this time around because we'd had our son in 2012 after the miscarriage but boy, was I wrong!

Everything will work out! You tell your family when you figure it's the right time! <3

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