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avereemorgan1119's Pregnancy
My Due Date: November 13, 2012I have given birth!
Age: 35 years old
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29w5d: Where did time go?
By avereemorgan1119 » Posted Sep. 2, 2012 9:45am - 471 views - 2 comments
It's been a very, very stressful month. I haven't even wrote anything since 25 weeks I believe. I feel like time is just escaping and I have no handle on it. I've been a wreck for the past few weeks. I cry all the time and feel so sad and useless. I feel gigantic. There isn't a single day that goes by that I'm not in pain. I am suffering with such bad sciatica that I can barely roll out of bed to use the bathroom at night. And if I move the wrong way, it hurts so bad I feel sick to my stomach. If I sit for a long period of time I feel the pain, walking is just about crippling, I can't get comfortable on either side, or on my back. It's just awful. It was in my left leg for the longest time but now moved into my right as well. I am so ridiculously uncomfortable, how am I suppose to make it ten more weeks? I can't believe this baby is going to get bigger... it's hard to imagine there's still room in there for her to grow...
And my stomach is getting more and more stretch marks and even though I expected it to, I just feel so awful about my body. I hate seeing them, they are so purple and ugly. I feel so ugly and unattractive. Sometimes I'll just lay down and cry. My face is so puffy, my feet are swollen to all hell, I'm retaining fluid, my skin is so itchy, I just don't feel like myself at all. Last night I was talking to my husband through tears and asked him how he could even possibly still be attracted to me. He stroked my hair and pulled against his chest and said to me, "You are carrying our daughter, and you are so strong and that makes you unbelievably beautiful." And I smiled and felt so good after he said that. I always thought I feel beautiful while pregnant, but I just don't. I wouldn't trade it for the world, but I don't feel good about myself at all. I know it will be better in time, but I can't wait to actually feel better about myself.
So now that I'm pretty much done whining, I'll get into the other tough part of this pregnancy. I've been getting labor inducing contractions and have been in and out of the hospital for two weeks. I've missed work, been on bed rest, been in pain... it's been awful. The baby is fine, they said she's healthy, but they can't figure out why my body wants her out so bad. So I've been having to be closely monitored and it's stressful. I just want to hold her, I will be so happy when she's here and I don't have to have that sense of fear anymore. It will be such a relief.
Other than that now much new has happened... I have just been having a tough time. I do feel her moving all the time, she gets her little feet under my rib cage and it hurts! And she always has the hiccups. The doctor said she's a thumb sucker... so cute lol. It's so weird to watch my stomach move when she kicks... silly little girl.
Only ten more weeks... I can do this...
My Journal
29w5d: Where did time go?
By avereemorgan1119 » Posted Sep. 2, 2012 9:45am - 471 views - 2 comments
It's been a very, very stressful month. I haven't even wrote anything since 25 weeks I believe. I feel like time is just escaping and I have no handle on it. I've been a wreck for the past few weeks. I cry all the time and feel so sad and useless. I feel gigantic. There isn't a single day that goes by that I'm not in pain. I am suffering with such bad sciatica that I can barely roll out of bed to use the bathroom at night. And if I move the wrong way, it hurts so bad I feel sick to my stomach. If I sit for a long period of time I feel the pain, walking is just about crippling, I can't get comfortable on either side, or on my back. It's just awful. It was in my left leg for the longest time but now moved into my right as well. I am so ridiculously uncomfortable, how am I suppose to make it ten more weeks? I can't believe this baby is going to get bigger... it's hard to imagine there's still room in there for her to grow...
And my stomach is getting more and more stretch marks and even though I expected it to, I just feel so awful about my body. I hate seeing them, they are so purple and ugly. I feel so ugly and unattractive. Sometimes I'll just lay down and cry. My face is so puffy, my feet are swollen to all hell, I'm retaining fluid, my skin is so itchy, I just don't feel like myself at all. Last night I was talking to my husband through tears and asked him how he could even possibly still be attracted to me. He stroked my hair and pulled against his chest and said to me, "You are carrying our daughter, and you are so strong and that makes you unbelievably beautiful." And I smiled and felt so good after he said that. I always thought I feel beautiful while pregnant, but I just don't. I wouldn't trade it for the world, but I don't feel good about myself at all. I know it will be better in time, but I can't wait to actually feel better about myself.
So now that I'm pretty much done whining, I'll get into the other tough part of this pregnancy. I've been getting labor inducing contractions and have been in and out of the hospital for two weeks. I've missed work, been on bed rest, been in pain... it's been awful. The baby is fine, they said she's healthy, but they can't figure out why my body wants her out so bad. So I've been having to be closely monitored and it's stressful. I just want to hold her, I will be so happy when she's here and I don't have to have that sense of fear anymore. It will be such a relief.
Other than that now much new has happened... I have just been having a tough time. I do feel her moving all the time, she gets her little feet under my rib cage and it hurts! And she always has the hiccups. The doctor said she's a thumb sucker... so cute lol. It's so weird to watch my stomach move when she kicks... silly little girl.
Only ten more weeks... I can do this...
Comments for this Journal Entry
 | Comment from avereemorgan1119 » Posted Sep. 2, 2012 8:57pm Whoa baby! Tell that little boy to slow down! Wish time would slow down a bit, but then on the other hand I just want her here with me. UGH make up my mind!! lol :) |
 | Comment from kaylia2oo5 » Posted Sep. 2, 2012 7:59pm If it makes you feel any better, I've been really whiney, and emotional here lately too! We were watching TV and a commercial came on for the season of "Greys Anatomy" that it is now available for sale. I got telling my Mom about the ending of the season, and sat there and cried! I also feel like time is FLYING by! My last prenatal appointment they said Karter is measuring 4 weeks ahead of time, and if he keeps going at this rate, they're going to have to induce me early (in October). That cuts my time again! Hard to believe eh?!! |
