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Category: Relationships During Pregnancy

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Q: Hubby and I fighting and now everything doesn't seem right. Please help!!

My husband was previously married and had a child who he was around for 3 days because his wife kicked him out. Him and I are expecting our first child. He hasn't seen his other child and is not close. He has said before he doesn't feel like a father because he is not around and is not allowed to act like a father the few times he has gone to visit his child that lives out of state. Since our due date is getting closer we have been talking and now all of a sudden he says that he loves his son and our daughter the same. When before he said he loves him but only because he is his son since there is no relationship. I am upset because he will be around our daughter more and get to experience everything with our daughter so wouldnt the love and the bond be stronger? He said it would be the same. I am really worried because I don't want my daughter to have to compete for her dad to love her. He always compares everything to that situation with us and my pregnancy and the baby. am i wrong?

This question was asked May. 20, 2012 1:08pm
Category: Relationships During Pregnancy

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Answered by a member - May. 20, 2012 2:41pm
While I think that the previous post was unnecessarily aggressive and unhelpful, I agree that this problem is too big for an online forum to help you with. Have you considered relationship counselling? It can be very helpful, especially during pregnancy when there are all sorts of things that can put strain on a relationship. It's important for a parent to love all their children equally, whatever the situation - though it sounds like there are lots of other complications with your husband's relationship with his son which are bothering you. There are clearly many details in this situation that need working through with time and the advice of a professional. Really hope you manage to work it out, all the best.

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