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Category: Relationships During Pregnancy

Asked by Dabrila

Q: It feels wrong.

My boyfriend told me he would be out late entertaining clients for work. He came home at 3:30am drunk on a work night like it was no big deal. I had a suspicion that he had been lying to me. I was out of town for my baby shower and when I got back, I noticed female perfume in his truck and the seat was all different from how I normally had it set.
I went through his phone and found out that he met a stripper and had been taking her out on dates. I text her to find out more cause I know he would deny everything. She said they only met up twice, nothing sexual happened, but I still feel cheated.
He tells me he just went out with her because I'm not fun to go out with anymore because I'm pregnant and he misses how we used to be. We used to go out partying every weekend.
What do I do? I feel so insecure now.

This question was asked May. 8, 2012 8:02pm
Category: Relationships During Pregnancy

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Answers (17)

Answered by Mary_asthred - May. 9, 2012 2:02pm

Dont be so naive...He does not deserve u. So u better be off with him..A cheater alwys a cheater..

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Answered by Falliiing - May. 9, 2012 2:35am

That is totally cheating in my book.
He would be out in the streets if that were my husband. Beaten bloody too.
Im not very nice when it comes to that kind of stuff.
Im so sorry for you.

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Answered by toshska - May. 9, 2012 9:56am

Make sure he doesnt twist it onto you. Just because you are pregnant etc. I real man will deal with it, Your not going to be pregnant forever.
Why couldnt he of made a guy pal and go out for a few drinks with him.. why did he have to make "friends" with a stripper..
Hmmm good luck honey, but if it were me i would of left by now.. xxx

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Answered by looney - May. 9, 2012 2:10pm

Forgive me, I'm sorry, I just noticed it said your boyfriend, and not your husband. I don't know why I assumed you two were married. STILL, before giving up on that dirt bag ;) (JK) you two need to work it out in counseling. ((hugs))

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Answered by Layne-Shane - May. 9, 2012 2:58am

wow,im so sorry for u. I could only say try it in his shoes to see if u can justify it. If u cant ull be like me and end up resenting him. On a darker note why did he have to pick a stripper? really? im so sorry hun, i say b$ this baby comes out u shud invest in a couples counseling,thats what id do cause honestly i would not be able to work it out on my own :( so sorry hun. i just read this to my so and i said y a stripper,he said cause they r fun,and then also stated be something i would do :(( as in me not him) started a argument now. good luck momma

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Answered by redhead628 - May. 8, 2012 8:39pm

Take it from someone who has already been in your shoes once before. Once that trust is gone it takes a lot to get it back, if it ever comes back. Most guys do not understand what we are going through, but this does NOT give them the freedom to go out with a stripper because you are 'no fun' anymore. It's a copout! If you need to talk or vent you are more than welcome to message me. I have been so paranoid with this pregnancy because my ex husband cheated on me when I was pregnant with our child.

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Answered by kawaimichiko - May. 19, 2012 5:29am

If your gut says it felt wrong then it's wrong. Never ever ever let a male type make you feel insecure. Daddy issues are only as big as you make them.

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Answered by nwelch - May. 8, 2012 9:37pm

aaawww sooo sorry to hear that. I would count that as cheating!!! Send him packing. You don't deserve to be treated like that. Once a cheater always a cheater, and that's just my opinion. Hows he going to be when the babies born? He will probably be jelous of the baby and that will be his exuse next time.You spend to much time with the baby and not him. I feel hes being very selfish. Good luck and don't put up with that.You deserve better. Take care.

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Answered by redhead628 - May. 10, 2012 8:35pm

I raised my daughter by myself. Her father gave up rights to her when she was 3. She will be 18 in July and has a great head on her shoulders. She is very leary of guys...especially the ones I dated. She actually can pick out the dirt bags before I can. If he doesn't want to be an active part of her life, you can't force it...trust me. You two can work together and still raise her in a healthy environment, provided there is give and take on both sides. If he doesn't just look at it this way....you can raise her the way you want and instill morals and qualities in her that he could negate. Take which ever way this falls as a gift. You can do it!

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Answered by a member - Jun. 7, 2012 3:27pm

Kick his azz to the curb. I know from experience if they lie or cheat once about something so serious it is a never ending cycle. Find a man who has some class and integrity & respect for women.

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