HzlGreenEyes's Pregnancy

My Journal

Monday Monday...
By HzlGreenEyes » Posted Jun. 8, 2015 11:04am - 319 views - 9 comments

I am waiting to hear the results from Friday's HCG and Thyroid levels and Sunday's HCG levels. I did another FRER this morning and it is darker than Friday and Saturday's HPT. I prayed this morning asking GOD to hear my prayers for this Baby. I pray that this is my Rainbow and my Blessing... I hope this is what I have prayed for.

I started picking out baby names having the meaning of God's Blessing and similar. For Girls, I like Eliana, Liliana and Clara. For Boys I like Asher, Barke and Ryder. I know it's early and anything can happen but it is just one thing I can do during these beginning stages.

I still have Connor's clothes in drawers that I left alone but I am starting to get the temptation to go through the drawers again. I also haven't looked at the pictures the photographer at the hospital took of Connor in his Baptism outfit... still hurts. I want to look at them but I can't bring myself to look at them yet. I feel as his birthday comes, I will have enough strength to look through the box the hospital gave me with his things and to see his angelic face again. For now I have the images in my head that cause me to choke up... even now as I type this.

I forgot how the time in the beginning of a pregnancy drags on...

Comments for this Journal Entry

	Comment from snolie14 » Posted Jun. 11, 2015 11:20am Sending prayers your way mamma! THIS is your rainbow, I just know it! :-)
	Comment from CrystalB88 » Posted Jun. 8, 2015 6:54pm Wishing you the best (hugs) Sending lots of healthy vibes your way and hope this is your rainbow...
	Comment from HzlGreenEyes » Posted Jun. 8, 2015 6:51pm Thank you Stickybean1976! It hasn't been easy. At this point in this pregnancy, I'm starting out rocky looks like. Got a call from my nurse practitioner and said my hcg levels are low but have doubled to 56miu/ml.
	Comment from stickybean1976 » Posted Jun. 8, 2015 3:39pm I told my husband last night you were pregnant again and he said straight away. I know who your talking about and how wonderful. Nothing in this entire world could be as difficult as losing a child. You are a strong woman. Take Care and try and enjoy this pregnancy xx
	Comment from HzlGreenEyes » Posted Jun. 8, 2015 3:21pm I appreciate the prayers! And I'm sorry i brought tears while reading my JE. I am still going through the emotions and so much more since I found out we are pregnant again (hormones I suppose). I talk myself down when I start to think back to February so that I don't ball my eyes out. This will pass and Cattsmeow, I thank you for that. I am sorry that you too had to endure such pain. I would never wish it on my worst enemy. I got my first HCG level from Friday which is 21miu/ml. Still waiting on my levels from yesterday morning... i call my ob office and they are looking into why they didnt get those numbers back yet. I will keep you informed!
	Comment from Kate0406 » Posted Jun. 8, 2015 2:28pm <3 <3
	Comment from Summer0120 » Posted Jun. 8, 2015 12:41pm Might be the hormones, but your JE today made me cry. :( I will be praying for you. I hope this baby can fill the hole that was left in your heart. Or at least soften the sadness. I can't imagine ever losing a child. Can't wait to hear your results!!
	Comment from Randall0123 » Posted Jun. 8, 2015 11:52am I can't wait to hear your results either. Will they be calling today? I love your names.